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Articles Dr. Newberger wrote as a Contributing Editor for The Church Report Magazine along with  such notables as Chuck Colson, former Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich, "Dr. Phil" McGraw, Beverly LaHaye, Jay Sekulow, and others.

Have you ever gone to a social gathering that primarily consists of private conversations between two or three people? The number of people you connect with is largely determined by how vigorously you “work the room.” I have been to many such gatherings....
The Bonehead Play  June 2007
The 1929 Rose Bowl headline read, “Riegels’ 60-Yard Run Toward Wrong Goal Helps Georgia Tech Win on [West] Coast 8 - 7.” UCLA team captain, center Roy Riegels, had recovered a fumble and began to run with the football. In eluding tacklers, Riegels got turned around and started toward his own goal....
I recently received a letter from a church member. This Christian woman was frustrated because the elders in her church seemed to, as she put it, “blow me off” when she raised a concern about the deteriorating health of the church and their role in it. At the end of her letter she asked if there was anything I could do....
What is the distinction between a healthy difference of opinion and destructive arguing? The answer is when people become “antagonists,” which from the Greek means, “to struggle against.” Hence, when someone starts directing energy away from a given problem and begins to struggle against another person, the line delineating destructive conflict has been crossed and bad things begin to happen....
What can be done to address the difficulty churches have in dealing with conflict? The first thing is to change people's minds in terms of what they should expect to find in the church. The Mennonites have taken the lead among Christian denominations in this area. They have gone on record stating....
If there is one place where people expect to find a respite from the troubles of the world, it is in their church. When conflict emerged, a member reflected the confusion of many people when he stated, “I thought the church was different from other organizations – especially with regard to conflict.” Unfortunately, the one place people expect differences to be managed well is the one place where they are not....
One of the earliest lessons I learned as a church conflict resolution specialist is not to readily accept the diagnosis of another no matter how neutral that person may be. Is this because I am a born skeptic, or simply untrusting of others? If I were to ask you, “what was at the root of Paul and Barnabas’ conflict recorded in Acts 15,” what would you say?....
When it comes to matters of peace, the New Testament couldn't be clearer. There are many instances where peace is mention. Jesus: “be at peace with one another” (Mk. 9:50); Peter: “seek peace and pursue it” (1 Peter 3:11); Paul: “preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Eph. 4:3); “pursue the things which make for peace” (Rom. 14:19); “live in peace with one another” (1 Thes. 5:13)....
One pastor I spoke with about conflict in his church stated: "It was devastating, really. I was so deeply wounded. That's one of the reasons I decided I had to leave. I was like a ship tossed about on storm-driven seas without anchor, rudder, sail. And I felt like, not only was I being tossed about, but I had a few holes in me because I hit the reefs. There was water pouring in. I felt like I was going down. I was manning the pumps, and it wasn't good enough. It was excruciating. I felt I couldn't live like this anymore. The conflict day-to-day was too great"....
An old-fashioned pocket watch illustrates a physical law which Einstein considered the premier law of all science - the second law of thermodynamics. In layman’s terms: in closed systems, there is an irreversible tendency for energy and matter to move from order to disorder. Systems or things that are not open to outside influence run down, break down and become less and less useful....
In my last column, we looked at the church discipline passage in Matthew 18 and noted from a close reading of the text that it only applies to sin (v. 15), a charge of sin evidenced by two or three firsthand witnesses (v. 16), and a sin serious enough to remove a person from fellowship (v. 17). Given these limitations: 1. What do you do when conflict between believers arises that does not involve sin? and 2. In such instances, what do you do after you have directly spoken to the other person but the conflict is still not resolved and interpersonal tension remains?....
A few years ago, I reviewed some 40 church bylaws. Not surprisingly, virtually every one of them had a section on church discipline. This is good, because Jesus outlined the process to follow when someone commits sin serious enough to warrant removal from the church if not satisfactorily resolved by the wayward member....
The new associate pastor met every goal set by the senior pastor. One influential family, however, was not happy with his accomplishments because they didn't want them. Over time, this family’s complaining, along with others they had enlisted, began to change the senior pastor’s perception of the associate. Eventually, the senior pastor called the associate into his office and requested his resignation. He explained that there were families in the church who were unhappy with the associate’s performance and he, the senior pastor, now agreed. After a futile round of talks, the associate was given an insufficient severance package, this just after building a new home....
I recently received an e-mail from a senior pastor who was inquiring about my conflict resolution and reconciliation services. He decided not to turn to his own denomination for help. He wrote, "Our denomination has a state staff which is available for mediation and conflict resolution. But my honest opinion is that they know just enough to be dangerous. I've not worked with them because every church I know of where they've "helped" has ended up worse than before they intervened"....

Published in Mediate.com 

Cited in Church Central 

Written as Columnist for Monday Morning Insight
This article picks up where last week's article left off. 7. A Person To Expel, Withdraw From, or Ruin (other person focused, greatest intensity)The parties are locked in an all-or-nothing battle. The church is no longer big enough for...
This article picks up where last week's article left off. 5. A Person To Attack (other person-focused, greater intensity)A power struggle emerges. Parties now see themselves as adversaries and antagonists (a Greek word that means “to struggle against,” as...
Introduction: Two intensifying processes take place throughout the stages of unresolved conflict: (1) an increasing personal frustration over the unresolved issue(s), and (2) an increasing negative perception of the character of the other person / people. Church conflict can deteriorate to...
Some individuals were not happy with the leadership style of the new pastor. Frustrated, they went to Sunday school but boycotted the service. Let's call them group A. The new pastor in turn was hurt and discouraged and left....
(Continuing from last week's article, Part 3) Therefore, when we attack another's personhood, not only do our all-inclusive assessments of negativity invariably miss the mark, but they also make conflict more intractable. One person's reductionist view of the other disputant...
(Continuing from last week's article, Part 2) PEOPLE'S PERCEPTIONS. Making the Transition Changing expectations is the first of two major steps that will help churches to better deal with conflict. The second has to do with the way conflict is viewed once...
(Continuing from last week's article, Part 1) Making Expectations More Realistic.  What can be done to address the problem many churches have in dealing with conflict? The first thing that needs to be done is to change people's minds in terms...
Runaway congregational conflict can have huge detrimental effects on church life and ministry. Churches are surprisingly unprepared to deal with in-house disputes unrealistically expecting that agreement will always mark relationships. Because of the damage churches suffer when disputes are poorly...
The Physical World. A pocket watch illustrates a physical law which Einstein considered the premier law of all science. It is called the second law of thermodynamics. Not being a scientist, I will state the law in layman's terms. In...
1. How should the work of a church mediator be understood? The concept of an “embedded” reporter during the war against Saddam Hussein's regime provides a useful analogy to the work of a mediator. How so? The peacemaker enters into...
The Problem All Church Leaders Face.  A universally understood phenomenon in organizations is that information gets filtered out on the way up the chain of command. This is especially true of bad news. In congregations, leaders know less about member's...
An important document of the church membership process is the covenant of membership form. It signifies a shared understanding by those who sign it and become identifiable members of that church. It also tells the church's spiritual leaders that these...
Briefly summarizing a portion of last week's posting, a third alternative to unconditional forgiveness and bitterness toward an unrepentant sinner was proposed. That alternative is being “willing to forgive. In being willing to forgive, the person who is wronged strives...
Is Biblical Forgiveness Conditional Upon a Wrongdoers Repentance? Yes. One of the most practical questions relating to forgiveness is this: according to the Bible, is forgiveness dependent upon the...
Forgiveness plays an instrumental role in the rehabilitation of interpersonal relations. Consequently, it is important to view forgiveness from many different perspectives to best appreciate it for what it is and is not. In this posting, let's consider three. Bob's...
Put Yourself in His Shoes.  Last week, I recounted the unique experience of Simon Wiesenthal, a Jewish concentration camp prisoner, at the bedside of a dying Nazi. The Nazi recounted his horrific crimes and asked this Jewish stranger for forgiveness....
Editor's Note: We will be taking a break from Ken's series on how to build the perfect church to address the timely subject of forgiveness.]Introduction Peacemaking, in its fullest flower, is about reconciliation. And this is a multi-faceted process. An integral step...

How to Build the Perfect Church (special series)
Introduction.  Last week, Rick Veil [February 25, 2005, 08:45 AM] provided an encouraging report about a recent retreat he had with his elders. This occasion of open communication and clarification came before hidden concerns were left to metastasize. Too...  
Editor's Note:  If you are new to this column, please read Ken's foundational article from January 27, 2005, “The Four Issues All Churches Deal With.” This will help you understand the basis upon which this and the other articles in...
Editor's Note: If you are new to this column, please read Ken's foundational article from January 27, 2005, “The Four Issues All Churches Deal With.” This will help you understand the foundation upon which this and other subsequent articles are...
Last week, I outlined the four major categories by which any society, organization, or church can be analyzed. They are structure, culture, interpersonal relationships, and the individual. Beginning with this post, we turn our attention to church structure...
Introduction.  Some time ago I was with a pastor friend of mine. As we were walking to his church office I jokingly remarked to him that the only churches where I always agreed with the pastor were the ones I pastored....
Today, we start a new series with Church Conflict Resolution specialist Ken Newberger. We're entitling this new series: The Newberger Project: Building the Perfect Church. It's going to be an exciting adventure! Ken writes: We have a wonderful opportunity through...

Conflict?  Ask Ken (continued)
Today, we'll continue with our subject on church firings... here's the question once again: Dear Ken, I am the senior pastor of a church that averages between 150 - 200 for Sunday morning worship. I have a number of...
Today's question is one that I hear a lot at ChurchStaffing... Dear Ken, I am the senior pastor of a church that averages between 150 - 200 for Sunday morning worship. I have a number of questions relating to...
This week, I am excerpting three sentences from a recent e-mail I received from a senior pastor who was inquiring about my services. He decided not to turn to his denomination for help. He wrote, in part, Our denomination...
Recapping Last Week's Posting Last week, we considered the application of Matthew 18:15-17. We noted its...
Ken writes, I recently had a conversation with an individual who outlined what she thought were the steps to resolving all conflict in the church. She noted that if Susie has a problem with Marsha, Susie should go directly to...
Here's this week's Conflict: Ask Ken question... Dear Ken, My husband worked for the church I grew up in for 7 years as the youth minister. After 3 yrs, a woman in the church (on staff and a church...
Here's this week's Conflict: Ask Ken question... Dear Ken, Ours is a church of 600. Leaders of this church cannot decide who should lead. Actions are being taken and there is a lack of agreement within the congregation. There...
Here's this week's "Conflict: Ask Ken" question... Dear Ken, We have a major control issue. Our pastor doesn't respond well to strong personalities in the church who disagree with him. We have several board members who like to have...
Here's this week's "Conflict: Ask Ken" question... Dear Ken, I was suddenly fired from my job Sept. 2 without any notice by the administrator in a very large church (average attendance of approx. 1,000) I had worked there full-time...
Here's this week's church conflict management question with Ken Newberger... Dear Ken, I have been pastor of the same church for nearly half a dozen years. Since I have been here, conflict occurs on a cyclical basis. Every six...
Today we'll continue our new series Conflict? Connect with Ken, featuring Ken Newberger, an experienced church conflict resolution specialist. Each week Ken will tackle a new question regarding problems and conflicts that are happening in churches across the country. (At...
Today I'm happy to premiere a new weekly feature here on the blog called Conflict? Connect with Ken, featuring Ken Newberger, an experienced church conflict resolution specialist. Each week Ken will tackle a new question regarding problems and conflicts that...

Quoted In: 
Waco Tribune Herald

Interviewed by:




© Copyright 2008 Kenneth C. Newberger.  All Rights Reserved.